I would be shocked if you told me you never had apprehension or fear when meeting someone new. The truth is we all have had this fear at some point in our life and most of us probably struggle with it to some extent. A big reason why we struggle with it is we overthink it. When meeting someone new, we oftentimes think we need to come up with something impressive to say or ask and the truth is thats the opposite of what we should do. When meeting someone new, keeping it simple is best.
So you see someone across the room that you’d like to talk to… You’re sitting in the airport bored and you want to start a conversation with the person sitting next to you… there is a cute girl standing at the bar… what do you say?
The answer is: hello.
That’s it. Just say hello. It doesn’t need to be grand or complicated. Why? Because if you say hello to someone, I GUARANTEE you they will say hello back. It happens every time. Let the conversation flow from there but hands down the greatest conversation starter is: Hello. Yet we all complicate it.
People say “Sam you are such a good talker or conversationalist!” It starts because I say hello to people.
People are impressed with people who initiate conversation. Why? Because it shows confidence and it shows that the person is taking the eyes of themselves and putting them onto you.
Years ago when I was focused on becoming a good conversationalist I would just say hi to people everywhere I went. Thats it. Id smile and say hi with no expectation of the conversation going any further. I wanted to build the muscle of starting conversations. If you have trouble starting conversations with people, start with just saying hello to people everywhere you go. You’ll be amazed at where conversations go from there and who you’ll meet.
If you try to think of something grand and spectacular to say to that person more likely than not they are going to think you are weird. Why? Because they have no relationship with you. It’s best to keep it simple and normal and you can’t get more simple and normal than hello.
I just got back from a cruise and I can give you the names of over 20 people I met and had significant conversations with throughout the five day trip. Almost every single one of those conversations started with some version of hello, hi, hey there. There wasn’t much else too it.
Don’t overcomplicate it. Say Hi. People will be impressed simple because you took the eyes of yourself and took the time to notice them.