What You Let Define You

“What you let define you determines how you react when shit hits the fan.”

Do you let the opinions of others define you? Do you let your past failures define you? Do you let your circumstances define you? Do you let your environment define you? Do you let your income define you? These are all things I have struggled with in my life and if we were all real with ourselves we have probably struggled with or are currently struggling with them. I used to be an emotional wreck as a soccer player because I let the opinions of my teammates and coaches define me as a soccer player. One week I felt great about me as a player because I knew my teammates and coaches had a high opinion of me, the next week I felt awful because I thought that maybe that opinion changed. Ive let my income define me and how valuable I thought I was. Ive let my past failures in relationships define me and what my relationships would look like in the future. I think this is a dangerous place to be in because we put our value on something we have no control over, and on something that is guaranteed to change. The opinions of others are guaranteed to change. Your income will fluctuate. Your circumstances will change. Your environment will change and you can’t do anything about your past failures.

 

The question becomes then why do we let these things define us and ultimately let them effect our happiness and future? The answer is undoubtedly because we don’t have a solid foundation that doesn’t change. When someone says you’re not good enough, or you can’t do something, or your not important, or valuable, what do you turn to? I am getting to the point in my life where I don’t care what people think, I don’t care what my circumstances say, my past failures don’t define me but instead have strengthened me because I have let something that doesn’t change define me. My foundation is in a loving god that created me the way that I am for a specific and unique purpose. When shit hits the fan, when someone has something negative to say, when I fail miserably, I have a choice. I can either let those things define me or I can remember that I am created and designed for a unique and specific purpose. No person, no circumstance, no adversity, no environment can change that.

Am I deserving? This is a question that can be hard to answer because most of the time we answer that question through the lens of what we let define us. The good book says “God gives us the desires of our heart.” We all have things we desire or want. However many of us never strive for those things because we don’t feel deserving of those things. Why don’t we feel deserving? Because what we let define us is ever changing or out of our control. I know I am deserving of the things I want because I was created to have those things and that will never change. Why would God give me those desires if I wasn’t supposed to have them? The answer is he didn’t. He created you for them. You were uniquely designed the way that you are, with the unique talents and gifts you have, to fulfill those desires that he gave you. Thats the beauty of life. You can be and have whatever you want because you were given freely the ability to have or be whatever you want.

The beauty of life is that no matter what others say, no matter what your current circumstances are, no matter what your current income is, no matter what your current environment is, who you are is not defined by those things. Who you are is defined by your purpose. Your purpose is defined by your gifts. Your gifts were given to you and no one else on earth for the specific reason of accomplishing that purpose. Thats how valuable you are. You are so valuable to the world that there is no one else like you. There is no one else with your specific gifts and purpose. One of my favorite quotes is “Be yourself, everyone else is taken.” There is nothing more freeing than being who you were created to be. You don’t have to be imprisoned by the opinions of others. You don’t have to be imprisoned by your past failures or experiences. You don’t have to be imprisoned by your circumstances. You can be set free by the revelation of purpose.


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